Reset

So we have the “Frozen” soundtrack now.  We got it free when it was offered on Google Play last week.  Thanks A LOT, Tricia Clements (who claimed she cares more about my daughter’s happiness than for my sanity!)  And yes, Christmas this year was all about FROZEN for my 7 year old daughter.  She got a number of Anna and Elsa dolls, accessories and even a large stuffed Olaf.  Oh, and the pressing need to continually ask me if I “wanna build a snowman???”

So predictably, our road trip yesterday was well equipped with the ongoing melodic advice to simply “Let It Go!”

It made me think of poor Elsa’s life.  All those years she spent hiding and concealing everything in her that she knew would be rejected and feared.  She kept everything hidden, including herself, in a futile attempt to be the epitome of the responsible and “good” girl.

…that is, until one sudden moment when it all was revealed.

Her entire life, in that quick moment was reset.  All of us who have had a reset moment in our lives knows that wondrous, horrific, fantastic, nightmarish moment when all the weight falls off you for all that you’ve been carrying in your vain attempt to hold it all together.  Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, you’re free… but at what cost?  And in a moment, everything has changed.

There’s been a reset.

So earlier this year, I had a chance to sit in a breakout session with one of my heroes, Jon Acuff.  He had just been through a reset in his life himself.  You could see it in the way he spoke and the way he sat before us.  He spoke to us of fear, but not in the same way he did when his advice was to simply “punch it in the face!”.  “Reset moments”, he told us, “are something we all have.  It’s all abut change and something we all have to go through.”

So how do we do it?

He shared with us his thoughts, which he said would be included in his upcoming book called “Do Over” (coming out this April).  He told us that there were four “territories” that our reset moments might land us, or take us through.  Was it a reset that came about voluntarily, or one that was an involuntary event?  Was it a positive thing?  A negative thing?

This week I had two Kid’s Pastor friends of mine go though a reset.  One started a brand new job at a new church in a new city.  This is her dream job with a wonderful ministry and a world of potential in front of her.  The other, a Kid’s Pastor of many years, had been struggling in a ministry that simply did not match what God was doing in her heart.  In obedience, she stuck with it for years until she felt God’s release.  And although she has no idea what or where to go next, she knew it was finally time to let it go.  I’m very proud of both of these women of God, and I’m proud of their families who are willing to take this journey together with them.  Both are in reset moments and while the path ahead of them will be long, they will both find that this journey will take them to places they could never have hoped to reach apart from this reset.

So you’ve found yourself in this new, strange place in life.  Maybe you sought it out.  Maybe, like Elsa, you were thrust into it and are throwing your hands up in the air, singing, “I’m never going back! / The past is in the past!”

So what now?

According to Mr. Acuff, the first step, after dusting yourself off, is to determine where exactly in the land of Reset you have landed.  From there, it’s about finding the right tools to take you successfully through the journey into the new life that awaits.  Here are the four lands…

The first is a very common place.  It’s THE DOLDRUMS.  This is a place that, although negative, it’s where you are voluntarily.  Perhaps it’s a life-sucking job, or a church that just isn’t where your heart is, or any number of places or situations you wish you could flee but you know you simply cannot.  Perhaps this is out of necessity or need.  It is here, Jon says, that our greatest tool is SKILL.  It is here we must develop skills that can be used for the future escape from the land of the Doldrums.  We can seek the answer from God about why we are here.  Perhaps He’ll tell us.  Perhaps not.  Be wary not to spend too much time making excuses for you being here.  Nor waste time blaming others.  The reality is that there are times you just need to suck it up and keep going!

Stop whining.  Keep working!  The Doldrums will seem to last forever, but they don’t!  Spend your time preparing for what lands lie ahead.

The second land is a harsh place.  It’s called THE BREAKS. It is a negative land that one travels to involuntarily.  Elsa found herself here.  Perhaps you did too.  I’ve been there myself.  Something happened and before your head could stop spinning, there you are.  That’s the breaks.  Maybe it has been building up for awhile, but one catalyst has set it off.  So now what?

First of all… breathe!!!!

Secondly, thank God that His greatest gift is grace!  Remember, other than Jesus himself, the Bible is full of people who had to travel through the Breaks.  In fact, the Bible could be called “God Loves Losers”.  Think about it.  Moses screwed up…  Loser!  But God referred to him as a “friend of God”  David screwed up… Loser!  Yet God referred to him as a “man after God’s own heart”.  Sure, you’re a loser.  Sure you are unqualified.  But God LOVES to use unqualified people to do crazy, amazing things.  So get ready, and let’s tread through this land together.

What you need most in the land of the Breaks is RELATIONSHIPS.  This land wants to isolate you.  Don’t let it!  You may notice that those people who you would have sworn would have had your back are suddenly nowhere to be found.  Don’t sweat it.  You’ll soon notice that people who were always on the fridge of your life suddenly are there in ways you’d have never expected.  I don’t know why this is, but USE IT!   Your foes and those who are indifferent, don’t mind them.  This is not the time to wage war against all the wrongs done to you.  You will find there are advocates (not really friends, but those who are willing to help where they can).  There will be friends and maybe even a few partners.  Be vocal with them.  We all wish people could be mind readers and anticipate our hurts and needs, but the truth is that they can not.  Learn to be vocal and to express your needs.  Lean into this season instead of living in denial or bitterness.  Admit that it hurts and look to the horizon.  It won’t last forever and one day you’ll wake up and find your in…

The land of THE MAKE.  This is the voluntary place you’ve been seeking. It is a positive place.  This is the step up into a better land.  Be ready for this.  Be wise when you’re here.

It is here that you’ll need CHARACTER.  Everything God has been developing in you through the Doldrums and the Breaks will serve you well in the Make.  Don’t let arrogance or pride claim you’re a self-made person.  Don’t convince yourself that you are deserving of these opportunities.  Yes, you have worked hard to be here, but it’s still God’s grace that you weren’t left to rot in the Doldrums, or left hopeless in the Breaks.  Breathe a sigh of relief.  Do a little dance of joy, and then get busy!

Remember, this place is never exactly as you dreamt it would be.  Often, it’s much messier.  Have a willingness to embrace this mess and adjust to it.  It isn’t always a clean, well-oiled process to your success.  The honeymoon will end and it will be hard-work.  Enjoy it anyways.  It’s the blessing that has been given to you.

There is one more land in which we sometimes find ourselves during a reset.  It, like the Breaks can also be unexpected.  It, also, can happen suddenly.  But this place is a positive place.  It is the land of HOPE!  This is a land that we must admit we didn’t create or deserve.  It’s more than the sum of our hard work and skill.  It’s more than we thought reasonably possible.  And yet there we are.

It’s grace on steroids!!!

If you are amazed to find yourself here, take a moment to breathe it all in!  Be amazed by it.  There’s nothing like it.  But then, get busy.  In this land you’ll need HUSTLE and GRATITUDE.  Have the humility to be thankful in the realization.  Be a good steward of these incredible opportunities offered to you.

And as a personal note from me, use this time to find someone in the Doldrums and the Breaks who is looking at you in awe.  Give them what you can.  I don’t mean just good advice.  And I don’t just mean the usual candidates.  Take this opportunity to change a life, as your life has been changed.  This can be the most amazing thing you ever do!

In all of these lands, watch out for two great pitfalls.  Those are failure and fear.  Failure is not always your foe.  It can teach you things that you would never learn voluntarily.  Fear will try to pin you down.  First it will tell you you can’t do it, and then, if you don’t listen, it will tell you that you need to do it ALL and PERFECTLY.  Neither are true.  Beware them both, but especially the later.  Learn what the truth is:  Speak what the truth is.  Believe what the truth is.  After all…

…The truth will set you free!

Do the work.  Stop fighting resets.  They will come anyways.  These are the gifts God uses to move us forward in our lives.  Remember the prayer of Paul for the church in Ephesians…

“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work in us…” (Eph. 3:20)

He is able, AND willing.  Travel well, my friends.

Oh, and when you read Jon’s book in April, act surprised.